Thursday, July 23, 2009

You say you love me, yet...

I need to get to bed, but I can't seem to clear my head.

Why is everything so hard? I'm trying really hard to stay positive. But I feel entirely beaten down to a bloody pulp.

I feel entirely broken. My eyes are blurry from the tears. It's like there's a permanent film blocking my vision. No snotty sobbing today, just slow and steady, salty Chinese water torture. All day.

I'm going to go to bed praying for sleep. I don't know if I'll be able to sleep in my own bed for awhile and desperately want one last good night of sleep. I don't think it will come. Even if it does I can't escape into my dreams. When I wake up the nightmare will still be here. Funny thing about sleep, I always seem to wake up.

Seems if you loved me I wouldn't feel this.

No comments:

Post a Comment